The Most Grief

A dietitian was once addressing a large audience in Chicago.
"The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed
most of us sitting here, years ago.

Red meat is awful. Soft drinks erode your stomach lining.
Chinese food is loaded with MSG. Vegetables can be disastrous,
and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs
in our drinking water.

But there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we
all have, or will, eat it. Can anyone here tell me what food it
is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after
eating it?"

A 75-year-old man in the front row stood up and said, "Wedding
cake"

haha to ZA

One time when I was a kid my mom was having a rally hard time making supper. First she tried to make hot dogs but they burned. So then she threw a frozen pizza in the oven. When she went to take it out for some reason the pizza hard shriveled up and was about an inch around, it had been a large. It reminded us of that old mustard commercial where everything wrinkles up to get away from the one type of mustard. We laughed so hard picturing the pizza running away from the mustard. It may have been one of those you had to be there to see the humour, but 21 years later we still laugh about the miraculous shrinking pizza.

In need of a new stadium

Last week I was bbq'in on a nice evening out back. I was feet up, listening to completely nothing, and relaxed as a tree standing forever in its place.

As I was in thought of nothingness, I stared to engage in a scent that I was not too familiar with but had a pretty good idea of what was going on.

I turned myself in desperation and to my disbelief I saw that my bbq was on fire! I ran over to shut of the gas and began throwing my arms around like the god shiva trying to put out the flames in all directions.

After a minute of amateur firefighting, I saw that the valves have been burnt to shit and now was in need of a new grill....

So am I left with no other choice but to search for a new stadium (bbq) to continue with my summer :(

People in the meat grinder

Hey Teachers...leave them kids alone

If you don't eat your meat, you can't have any pudding. How can you have any pudding if you don't eat your meat!?!

Tango with the Tuna

Today I have a bout that should not go on without any doubt of a fight.

I am going to double bake a tuna!

The reason behind the fight is that when double baked tuna, you have the potential to over cook the aquatic beast thus, wanting to just toss it in the bin for the gulls later.

I will start off the first round with a low blow to the tuna's inside as I butterfly the damn thing. I will add a few upercuts of fresh dill and parsley, then humiliate a return of a slab of buttery goodness.

I shall put the entire thing in the oven to bake for 15 mins as the flavorful concoction absorbs into the flesh. haha I think I got this round easily.

Second round:
I have a feeling this will not be so easy.

So far the tuna will be 60% cooked but now need to pull the bruised and tired speedious dorsality out from the oven and crust it with some italian spiced breadcrumbs and shaved almonds.

Using an egg, I beat it to death with lavish wisks from my unfair utensil, I cover the tuna with it so the crumbs and almonds adhere to it.

I beleive I will win this fight with a few blows back to myself due to the high temperature I require to crisp the coating.

With a few squirts of lemon in the eye, the tuna should tap out easily and submit to a fair defeat.

Place on wooden board, cut, and enjoy!

Tail-whip Talapia

Today I decided to catch some fresh talapia from the grocery store in hopes to construct a nice shore meal in my kitchen.

No need to thaw or tangle with the loose ends of cleaning and gutting. Just laying them on the counter and throw a one two punch of ultimate seasoning.

I've decided to use a mexican theme to this dish by adding the necessary spices as follows:

Paprika
Cajun
red chili flakes
white pepper
and home-made salsa.

I will grab hold of the exhausted fillets and smother them in this dry rub of spice then drown them in the salsa. I will then place them ever so kindly in a deep glass dish to bake for 25 mins
...hahaa can a fish actually die from drowning....? YES! in taste that is.

So here I go for something a little different but justifying to the taste buds as usual.

The Ultimate Sandwich Fighter

ngredients

• 2 sprigs thyme
• 2 sprigs tarragon
• 1/2 cup unsalted butter, room temperature
• 1 (4-pound) turkey breast
• Sea salt and freshly ground black pepper
• 6 slices country bread
• 1/2 pound fontina cheese, sliced thinly
• 1 large ripe avocado
• 2 teaspoons lemon juice
• 1 teaspoon extra-virgin olive oil
• 6 slices maple bacon, cooked until crispy
• Pepper lettuce (watercress)
• Butter, for sauteeing

Directions

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F.

To prepare the Roast Turkey: toss the herbs and butter into the bowl of a food processor and pulse until green and smooth. Rub the turkey breast with half of the herbed butter and with salt and pepper. Place the turkey on a rack in a roasting pan and put in the oven. Let the turkey cook for 1 hour, basting every 20 minutes with the butter and pan juices. The turkey is done when it reaches an internal temperature of 165 degrees F. Let rest for 15 minutes on the cutting board.

To assemble the sandwich: spread a thin layer of the remaining butter on 1 piece of the bread. Place 1 slice of the cheese and several slices of the turkey breast on unbuttered side of the bread. Peel and slice the avocado, toss with the lemon juice, olive oil, salt and pepper. Add avocado slices, crispy bacon slices, lettuce and another slice of fontina cheese to the top of that. Sprinkle again with salt and pepper. Slather the remaining piece of bread with the butter and place on unbuttered side out, on top of the bacon.

Heat a cast-iron or other heavy skillet over medium-low heat. Add 1 tablespoon of butter and let it melt, swirling the pan around to coat. Put the sandwich in the pan and weigh it down with a heavy pot or can (or wrap an ordinary brick in aluminum foil and set it on top to compress the sandwich.) Toast for 1 minute, turn the sandwich over before the bread begins to burn. Repeat with remaining sandwiches. Cut the sandwiches in half and serve

Fal-a-Fel

Today I decided to try and make my own vegetarian dumpling they call the falafel. I thought this would be an interesting choice as I've never seen anyone I know make this.

This is what how I made it:

Ingredients:

• 1 cup dried chickpeas or 16 oz. can of chickpeas or garbanzo beans.
• 1 large onion, chopped
• 2 cloves of garlic, chopped
• 3 tablespoons of fresh parsley, chopped
• 1 teaspoon coriander
• 1 teaspoon cumin
• 2 tablespoons flour
• Salt
• Pepper
• Oil for frying

Place dried chickpeas in a bowl, covering with cold water. Allow to soak overnight. Omit this step if using canned beans.

Drain chickpeas, and place in pan with fresh water, and bring to a boil.

Allow to boil for 5 minutes, then let simmer on low for about an hour.

Drain and allow to cool for 15 minutes.

Combine chickpeas, garlic, onion, coriander, cumin, salt and pepper (to taste) in medium bowl. Add flour.

Mash chickpeas, ensuring to mix ingredients together. You can also combine ingredients in a food processor. You want the result to be a thick paste.

Form the mixture into small balls, about the size of a ping pong ball. Slightly flatten.

Fry in 2 inches of oil at 350 degrees until golden brown (5-7 minutes).

Serve hot.

Serving Suggestion

Falafel can be served as an appetizer with hummus and tahini, or as a main course. Stuff pita bread with falafel, lettuce, tomatoes, tahini, salt and pepper. As an alternative, falafel can be formed into patties and served like a burger.

Jerkin da Chicken

Ok well I have got my hands on some really good stuff right from the island they call Ja mai ca. It's a well blend of herbs, spices, and prob some native added ingredient that will probably cause me to reach for something soothing to the taste buds; as I assume they will be screaming.

I just tossed a bunch of chicken in a bag, and poured in the secret, and laid it to rest in the fridge.

The weather is here for grilling so I spent a good hour(s) today cleaning it up in hopes to christen it today.

Revenge on the Ribs

Today I was up against a mean of marinated 4 days in the fridge stack of ribs. I began the fight by staring them down with a determined demeanor, followed by a tight grip on both ends so they couldn't escape.

As the pain pierced into the tips of my fingers, the heat was nothing but a meaningless particle of dust flowing aimlessly in the air.

I never gave in to look in any other direction and went right for it. The fight was already lost by the ribs before it had even began.

After devouring the rack, I paraded my winning with a beer and no use of any paper towel to clean up the evidence of an easy one sided fight.

Here is how to pick a fight with one of your own:

SOUTHWESTERN-STYLE RUB:
50 ml (3 tablespoons) ground cumin, 50 ml (3 tablespoons) chili powder,
25 ml (2 tablespoons) oregano, 15 ml (1 tablespoon) garlic powder,
25 ml (2 tablespoons) ground black pepper, 15 ml (1 tablespoon) salt.

Place all ingredients in jar with tight-fitting lid, shake well to blend seasonings thoroughly. Store covered at room temperature. Makes about 175 ml ( 3/4 cup-enough to coat 2 slabs of pork back

Simple de Soup

So as you can see, I should prob change my blog title to "what I ate for Supper" cause that's all I am really expressing in these blogs but for some reason I feel to full and lazy to do such a thing.

I just sipped down a ginourmous bowl of greatness that I made from scratch.

A little water, oil, and chicken stock was the foundation. I then tossed in some naked potatoes, some carrots that lost limbs by the second, some parsnips, and some barley which acted as the staple in this concoction.
I believe that "rooted" veggies give the soup the starchiness but also add the collective flavours required to bring on the warmth in the gut.

I boiled everything for about 2 hours consistently adding in various spices that controlled taste buds for the average tongue.

I cut up some fresh bread and went to town.

This is what I will try to eat tomorrow

Here's what I ate today - for old times' sake:

Morning:
-red pepper
-green tea
-eggs

Lunch:
-salad with lettuce mix, cucumber, green pepper, tomato, broccoli, purple cabbage, egg, tuna, feta, sunflower seeds, craisins

Dinner:
-yogurt w/ oat bran and raspberries
-avocado
-turkey burger

Pizza Potential

So I just finished gorging down a half pizza from Vesuvio's. I will say it's prob the best around, well, maybe in 15 mile radius from me.

I had half of a fresh Hawaiian and the other, pepperoni and green olives. I knew I'd enjoy it no matter what, I've never been disappointed at this place.

They could burn the fecking thing, spill tomatoe sauce allover it, or even forget to put crust on it and it would taste unbelievable.

So ya that's all I ate tonight for suppa, and now for a night cap of Nyquil to wash it down

After Eating

This guy really likes it!

After that meal...atleast a few hours later, I felt like something atleast healthy in a sense. I grabbed a bunch of blueberries and strawberries and threw them in some yogurt like a bunch of sorry bastards helplessly left to swim in a thick current of greatness.

Supper Tonight

Today I ate some chicken legs that were covered in spicy crushed up cornflakes. I must say that adding anything to chicken these days, do make it a bit more tasty to enjoy.

Have the chickens these days been raised so correct like an assembly line that you can't even enjoy chicken on its own anymore?

I also had a side of penne pasta mixed with fried mushrooms and onions. I tossed it all in a savoury gravy that completed the dish and gave it somewhat of a clothing.